Shoe-ing accurately

Throwing shoes at people has suddenly become a rage. If you don't like what somebody is saying or doing just throw a shoe at him. Just ensure a dozen news channels are there to capture the moment. The benefits of doing so are many. Mr. Muntazer al-Zaidi, the Iraqi journo who started the trend by throwing his shoe at George Bush became a hero overnight. Iraqis took to the streets in his support. Some parents even offered him their daughters in marriage. Others offered to support him financially during his incarceration and subsequent joblessness. The man who threw a shoe at the Chinese PM was far less successful. But that's only because he chose the wrong man to throw his shoe at. The Chinese have a habit of censoring all embarrassing news from the state controlled media. This seriously impairs any such unconventional bid for grabbing eyeballs. Otherwise, given the number of things the number of people in China are unhappy about, this man would have become an overnight star in China and an even bigger superstar in Tibet. Our own Jarnail Sigh has found his fifteen minutes of fame after throwing his shoe at the home minister. While the minister has himself tried to downplay the incident and "forgiven" him, other political parties are apparently making a mascot out of him. One party has allegedly announced a reward of five lakh rupees and another has offered him a ticket for the coming elections. I am sure others yet will come out with even more novel ways to fete him.

While the world debates on how to react to these new champions of the Shoe, I have only two observations to make. The first observation is that all these people are lousy shots. Not one of them could actually hit his target. That seems like a terrible waste. If your target has presented himself to you on a dais, standing up tall and erect to offer the largest surface area possible, the least you can do is to offer him the courtesy of at least touching his person with your missile. If you cannot do that, you have no business to be in the shoe throwing business. The second observation is a recognition of the age old Indian values of frugality and price consciousness. Where as all others chose to throw expensive branded shoes at their chosen targets with the Iraqi throwing the most expensive shoe, the Indian chose to throw a cheap unbranded shoe at his target. He must have realized it would be a terrible waste of hard earned money to spend more than is absolutely necessary on a shoe he would be wearing for just half a trip for it was always unlikely that the police would be courteous enough the return the offending shoe after the incident.

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The newly awakened

Would the Mumbai attacks have caused such a furor among the public if they had been directed at the usual targets? There is no doubt that these attacks are completely different from those in the past, both in their nature and their intent. But they are not so different when it comes to the body count. The serial blasts in Mumbai claimed more lives. And as for the symbolic value of the targets, they are definitely not more important than the parliament. So why is it that this time we are so angry about it? Is it because this is the first time that the victims are not just the common people on the streets or trains? Is it because this time the victims are the people who "count" in our society, the ones who actually have a voice? People died at CST just like they died in Taj but I do not hear about their miserable fate on TV. Our society has traditionally shown a strange kind of apathy whenever the nameless and faceless people have been affected by violence of any kind. Take the last serial blasts in Mumbai. The media sang about the spirit of Mumbai for a day or two, the authorities offered condolences and things went back to just the way they were. The people who survived the blast just took the same train to wherever they had to go the next day. There were no protests, no vigils and no calls to change the system. This time things are different. TV screens have been taken over by celebrities who have suddenly woken up to the threat of terrorism. Chat shows are filled with current and has been Bollywood stars talking about how unsafe the country has become. Media is filled with accounts of how angry the people are. I do not understand who are the people they are talking about. The "aam aadmi" has been frustrated and frightened for years now. Who are the newly awakened people? Are they they people who are not affected by bombs in trains or richshaws because they do not travel in them. Have they suddenly started to realize that they too are vulnerable? If the answers is yes, it is both pathetic and encouraging. Pathetic because there is this vast segment of society which just does not matter, people whose lives and deaths do not evoke any reactions from any one who has the power or the position to better their lot. Encouraging because maybe finally, the two classes are identifying with each other. All that remains now is to unite the political class with them. Or will they have to become victims themselves too before that happens?

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A look at Ekta's Mahabharata ... finally

After reading post after post on Ekta Kapoor's Mahabharata on Jabberwock's blog (honestly, the guy is obsessed with it) I finally got around to seeing it this Monday. It did not disappoint. The acting is horrible, the dialogue is contrived and the direction is pedestrian. The costumes of course are ridiculous. The sets are pretty good though. At least, they are not the usual Amar Chitra Katha style sets first created by Ramanand Sagar for Ramayana and adopted by every director since.
Two things stand out among all others. One is the furious pace of the serial. It covered Dhritarashtra and Pandu's marriage, Pandu's curse and the birth of the Pandavas and the Kauravas in one episode. Coming from soap opera makers who don't make their actors utter a single word without zooming in on their faces from half a dozen different angles this is amazing. Unfortunately, it not done very gracefully. There is a rushed feeling to things here. It is as if they are telling a bed time story to the audience and are worried that the listeners will be late for bed. It also does not let the audience appreciate the significance of these momentous events which shape the epic.
The second thing I noticed was the absolute lack of screen presence in any of the actors. It is hard to distinguish between all the royal princes and princesses. All of them look alike. One can't help comparing them with the cast of B.R. Chopra's Mahabharat. Whatever the shortcomings of that serial, the casting was absolutely spot on. This serial is supposed to bring together the reigning stars of Indian television. Not that I have any respect for the quality of Indian television today but I did expect to see at least a couple of actors capable of leaving their mark on some of the characters. Seems like I was expecting too much. The only actor I did remember between scenes is Shakuni who was trying so hard to look evil that I almost felt sorry for him.
All in all, it was an humourless and empty experience.

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Kunti Ke Bete

What kind of a name is Kahani Hamaraay Mahabharat Ki? It sounds too much like Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki for me to expect it to be any different from it. If Ekta Kapoor had to name the serial with ‘K’, Kunti Ke Bete would have been a better name.
I had recently said that all mythologies being aired today have the same standard for special effects as the B.R. Chopra’s Mahabharat two decades ago. It seems like this one has done better on that score. But only marginally. But what’s with the costumes? All characters have a Conan-the-barbarian in a dhoti look. That is true for most such serials like Dharam-Veer, Prithviraj Chauhan and now this.
My favourite screen version of Mahabharat was a serial called Mrityunjay. It was told from Karna’s perspective. Unfortunately, it was taken off the air after a few episodes. Mrityunjay was not the sort of serial to appeal to the Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki loving crowd. Hence the demise. Another class work sacrificed on the altar of mass appeal.

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Once upon a time in India...

I have taken the title for this post from an email my friend H sent me this morning. The mail contained stills from popular serials that were aired on Doordarshan when we were kids. It brought back a flood of memories from those days. The days when Doordarshan used to be the only channel around seem so long ago. I cannot remember the last time I watched Doordarshan. And yet, there was a time when our daily schedules were regulated by program timings on Doordarshan. The most maddening part of the day was the news hour. Father insisted on watching both the Hindi and the English news. He claimed that the english version contained more information. I failed to find both the difference between the two and why he didn't just watch the English version. What made it worse was that he demanded absolute silence during that time. News hour coincided with dinner time. So we were never allowed to talk during dinner. But it was not all bad. Apart from the special breakfast mom used to make on Sundays, Doordarshan was what made Sunday mornings so special. Mornings started with Chitrahaar at 7:00 AM. That was my and my sister's only chance to see newly released movies as we were not allowed to go to the theaters back then. Chitrahaar was followed by Disney Hour at 8:00 AM. The whole family used to gather around the TV for Ramayan at 10. That ended at 11. Everybody else moved off to do whatever they wanted to do after that. But my day was just starting. I used to stay glued to the TV for the english programmes that came later. Doordarshan provided me my first taste of western serials. My introduction to Agatha Christie was through David Suchet's Poirot. I faintly remember another serial called Bay of Danger. It involved a lot of flying in a sea-plane. I have never heard it being mentioned anywhere since then.

I can go on and on about Sunday mornings but I don't want to risk being called a bore. Though I am strictly against putting up copied material on my blog, I could not resist putting up the images from the mail. Here they are with my notes (couldn't resist those either):





The slowly revolving logo with the accompanying trademark music which used to indicate the start of any program. I don't think Doordarshan has changed the music even today. And rightly so. No other channel has been able to create a signature tune which identifies it to the viewers. All of them have to resort to something on the lines of "You are watching XYZ" to announce themselves.

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The most irritating image on TV ever. It was always accompanied by a mind numbing metallic whistle. I lost count of the number of saturday movies that were spoiled by this image. This was one thing I will never be nostalgic about, ever.

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Complan really did work wonders for these two. Did you ever imagine Complan boy and Complan girl would go on to become what they are now? Ayesha Takia still looks the same as she did then. Only a little plumper. Its hard to guess that the boy is Shahid Kapoor. Incidentally, I watched these two romancing each other in the eminently forgettable Fool N Final just yesterday.

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Vicco turmeric,
नहीं कॉस्मेटिक,
Vicco turmeric आयुर्वेदिक क्रीम
I have never used Vicco turmeric cream, but I thought the lady in its ads was simply the most beautiful woman on television then. She went on to played the role of Ahilya Bai in The Great Maratha. I have seen her in a couple of saas-bahu serials which I don't care to remember.

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वाशिंग पाउडर निरमा, वाशिंग पाउडर निरमादूध सी सफेदी , निरमा से आए,रंगीन कपड़े भी खिल खिल जाए
This ad showed a lot women creating a lot of foam while washing a lot of white clothes with just a spoon full of Nirma washing powder. I still hear people humming its jingle.

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Few screen adaptations manage to retain the spirit and atmosphere of their sources as well as Malgudi Days did all those years ago. Even today, I cannot read any of R.K. Narayanan's works without placing his characters in Shankar Nag's Malgudi. I think this still is from the episode about an old man (pictured) whose son comes back from the US with an American wife.

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Enough has been said about the phenomenona called Ramayan and Mahabharat. I won't add to it. Just for the records, my favourite was Mahabharat. I can't help noting though, that the mythological serials that are aired today have the same sloppy standard for special effects that these serials had almost 20 years ago. I guess poducers rely more on viewers' devotion for TRPs than on production values.

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Not a patch on Karamchand or Reporter. I was old enough to judge things like plots and production values by the time Tehekikaat was aired. I don't remember ever being satisfied by its resolutions. But it was fun to watch none the less. And definitely better than the later serials like Raja aur Rancho,etc. I think it was Saurabh Shukla's first big break. He played the role of Vijay Anand's assistant.

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Before Discovery, NatGeo and History channels made their debut in India, there were Surabhi and Turning Point. As far as I remember, Surabhi used to be aired on Saturday nights. It was as popular as Ramayan in our house. I remember sending answers to the weekly quiz quite a few times. I did not win even once. Thats not surprising really. The response the quiz generated every week would compare with what todays reality shows generate and that too when sending postcards was the only ways to participate. The government introduced special competition postcards priced at INR 3 just for these competitions. Turning Point was hosted by Girish Karnad. He used to give away prizes for best questions on science every week. I sent a number of questions but never won.

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Shyam Benegal's adaptation of Jawaharlal Nehru's Discovery Of India was one of the best serials ever aired on Indian televsion. It is difficult to accpet anyone other than Roshan seth as Jawaharlal Nehru. Bharat - Ek Khoj was part of Doordarshan's sunday morning treats. I was an avid follower. I still remember a few of the episodes which moved me most. The ones on sepoy Mutiny and ancient Vijaynagar, for example.




I didn't realize, I have rambled on for this long. This must be the longest post I have ever written. I have got to stop right now. Have to go and cook dinner anyway.

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